I am who I am

2011-11-19T17:15:00.001+08:00

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Wishing

2011-11-10T00:13:00.001+08:00

How I wish my life will be blessed with a fruit of love!
I have been longing for him for quite some times !
Time will not heal the emptiness in my life!
Ya Allah , give me and guide me through this painful yet calm journey of life!
Give me full strength to pull the courage in my marriage!

Update on new house

2011-04-23T10:16:00.000+08:00

Been so excited on moving to a new house lately...buy a bit frustrated when the house was not completed according to the agreement.lots of defect and even complaints about the defects were not rectified by the developer.called the handy man.now moving on putting some lamps some wiring works with the handyman.bought the lamps at Nilai 3 and Serdang.2 weeks before tinted the house.satisfied with the job.next week starts some painting and wiring work.hope my house will look better with the simple renovation work.

update: metal journey and losing weight...

2010-11-01T08:16:00.000+08:00

went to Borders yesterday with sis in law...surfing thru the book racks...found something interesting..bought it and hopefully i can finish reading it...knowledge is power....

my metal journey is enjoyable...

losing weight?hehhe i'm still trying....

metal journey

2010-10-22T21:29:00.000+08:00

start my metal journey today..

hope i can get thru this journey with bliss...

new resolution

2010-10-04T11:01:00.000+08:00

i've gained weight for the past few years...totally sucks...met the doctor for family planning...

was told to burn more carbs.....since now i'm totally obese with this hormone problems....at first it was really nervous since the total lost would mean disaster....but as a week past i'm more positive...

now i have lost 3 kg...

without exercise but no rice diet...

so this week would be no rice with exercise.....

hope i can reach the doctor's target...

Ya Allah help me get thru this...

sad memory :pls go away

2010-03-24T23:39:00.000+08:00

Telah jauh terpisah, diriku dan dirimu,
Dalam ruang dan waktu,
Sendiriku jalani sepiku, tanpa dirimu,
Resahku tanpa hadirmu,
Sungguh berat hatiku untuk merasakannya

Salahku mencintai dirinya saat jauhku terpisah
Darimu,Dan hadirnya menyentuh hatiku,
Untuk cintainya,
Hatiku pun inginkannya,
Hingga runtuh setiaku kepada dirimu

Kusakiti hatimu yang tulus mencintaiku….

C/O
Maaf ku tak bisa memilih dirimu
Karena kuterhanyut mencintai dia
Inilah salahku yang memberi ruang
Didalam hatiku tuk mencintainya…

(terhanyut jiwa ini, terjatuh dihatinya)

guess wat i dun really like listening to Malay songs compared to English or Japanese songs but this one particular song really make my life up side down for awhile...thinking about my past...

sometimes sincerely i do think about it..

what if i didn't change my life and still stick to those old memories..

i wont be here like this..

maybe my life wont be like this

maybe i wont keep on remembering those bitter sweets memories so much..

sometimes i even cried out deep inside my heart...

why does it really happen?

why cant my life will be better without remembering that stupid piece of stains in life...

that's why i have to keep my faith strong so that i wont keep on falling in those serious deep scars in my heart...

oh dear heart please dun hurt anymore..

enough is enough...

dun ever regret it again again

but sometimes remembering is unavoidable...

update!

2010-02-08T23:26:00.000+08:00

randomly we heard about all the accident in life...but when it comes nearer to the so called festival that whether a religious one or not..we often heard about the increment of accident especially during the special task campaign...hm I've been wandering and now the questions really overwhelmed myself... but as i searched throughout the net i can say that it is all fated..due to the excitement of holiday maybe some of us neglect all the important things even we try to do all the pre cautions we still can escape the fate..so to my conclusion whatever happen in my life....cherish all your loves one so that we can accept whatever fate has determined us.

*******************************

my dear family

i really love you all a lot....

May Allah bless us always...

********************************

tired

2009-11-26T19:08:00.003+08:00

sooo busy and trying to stabilizing my mood on writing and rambling again...ateh complaint asking me to update..so do my brother..hmm what can i say..lots of things happen but my brain just wont processed it and trying to digest all the problem seems to be so difficult especially when it involved your life..so happen if i managed to handle and settled all the problems seem wrong... i really miss myself my oneself and one and only self....I've been on medication afta my marriage due to the one and biggest accomplishment in marriage which is having a child...but i was not blessed with dat big accomplishment instead i was being tested with lots of unsolved matter...sometimes i do ask my self why?but according to one man....he quote "What is your why?" and i asked myself again what is my why?hmm thinking and dreaming doesn't seem to fit myself anymore becoz now part of me just doesnt like to think and dream..it is a really tiring thing to do becoz in the end is nothing....sometimes i really feel that I've been making lots of mistakes in my life but a part of me feel that i'm tired of trying....what can u do when you're tired of your life?*sigh**long paused*
so i have to think again before i manage to get the answer......

lets visit Malacca

2009-03-09T23:26:00.001+08:00

recent activity:

went back to Hubby's hometown.
visit Malacca town.
walked to Jonker Walk with hubby and sister in law.
enjoying burning calories.
release tension a bit.
visit m fave niece. Sofia Adriana.

hubby in Penang

2009-02-22T22:50:00.000+08:00

this is my latest hubby picture during his conference in Penang.Last year la actually.looking around in the picture folder and found his picture..just wanna upload because this year is our second year of marriage..he thinks he is so macho..haha so lets look at the macho boy..*he's pretending he didnt notice it during the time i snap his picture...

first time swimming

2009-02-22T21:28:00.003+08:00

today we all went to Tiara Beach Resort PD for a family gathering.we reached there at 3 o clock.went inside the resort room for about an hour and prepared for the bathing time..the picture uploaded were my niece picture named Sofia Adriana.She's now 5 months old and she's really good at capturing all the viewers heart with her fabulous smiles..she loves to smile so much..enjoy the picture..i have lots of picture that havent been updated..quite busy juggling my life...but i'll try my best to update later...enjoy these picture for the moment..gonna mish her so much..

Mannequin of Life

2009-02-11T01:08:00.002+08:00

Definition of mannequin:

A woman/ man who wears clothes to display fashions
A life-size dummy used to display clothes

We, believe it or not as a human,we will be mannequin when we walk through our daily life without completing our obligation towards Our Greatest Creator. When we do all those things and keeping distance with Him we will be lost in the right path. When we are lost we will keep on losing everything that we really had before. Sometimes we will bee keep on drifting apart from the reality of life. We will be walking constantly with our clothes on but the truth is we are naked and only Our Creator can see us like that. So don't lose your faith because mannequin is actually a puppet of life without a soul. We will lose our souls if we lose our faith to Our Creator.Bear in mind that we still know what we do wrong but when we became mannequin we already drifting apart from faith so we will working with our physical and brain. Brain without souls and faith is not human.
For those who was enlighten will be the special one that Our Creator love and not just anybody deserve it!
Always
Always
Always

Love and commit to Our Creator
Love and treasure your family

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

new habits

2009-02-07T20:37:00.002+08:00

i got a particular habits that sometimes it will make other person feel that i'm so petty or watsoever...but the things is my habits is something that will appear depends on my mood during dat time...especially now i'm staying with other person dat was surely not my family.
i've to adapt to all the things dat will be awkward such as

He loves to sing in the bathroom.
He prefer to go to night market.
He loves to watch football or sports so much.
He loves to go to work by motorcycle even though he knew that it will be raining cats and dogs at the end of the day.
He loves to go late for work even though some of his friends thot dat i'm the reason he went late for work.
He loves to watch his notebook even though i'm staying with him.

so this is why i develop new habits so that we can accomodate each other:

I will be lying on the bed surfing da net even though i have no idea wat to surf or to find with the google anymore.
I will only watch TV so estaticly when he is not in da house.
I prefer to call my parents more often to overcome this boredom.
I will try to find all the details about the things dat i can think of.

Happy New Year

2009-01-18T19:40:00.002+08:00

Below is the picture of the temple that i visit last holidays..The Ginkakuji Temple...so nice covered with snow.....hmm missing my vacation...hehehe
The picture of Mount Fuji... coming soon...with sakura flowers...hmm so nice..so beautiful...really grateful with Allah blessings....Hope i can visit Japan again...striving hard in saving money for 2009

new year resolution:

saving lots of money...

enjoying my life....

waiting for my brother to come back!

mouth ( keep it shut to avoid problem)

2008-12-26T21:49:00.002+08:00

sometimes becoz of mouth we lose our maturity and professionalism.but as for me..one thing that i'm really sure..i dont simply judging people by his or her appearance..as org melayu selalu kata kubur masing2...
we can see lots of people get into trouble the minute they open their mouth...
as we can still remember wat our ustaz or ustzah love to tell us...
especially in the month of fasting..
"jaga mulut tuh..kurangkn bercakap..bykkan berzikir"
this is wat our Prophet always do..
if u really want people to be inspired by the word that came out ur mouth...
think b4 u talk!
hahha same goes to the recycle slogan
Think before u throw!
dats all for now...let do some repentition so that u wont regret wat u hurt other people before this ok..
gambate kudasai.
oyasumi nasai!

new update on my trip to Japan

2008-11-21T14:18:00.000+08:00

My Small Casio Exilim View..Kawaii.....

2008-11-18T12:12:00.001+08:00

currrent update!

2008-11-18T11:54:00.002+08:00

im currently in Japan spending my holidays for two weeks in Japan or more specific my brother place in Gunma Ken,Maebashi....it is very chill here.the temperature is 11 degree celcius.tmrw will be 5 degree celcius..
hmm one lifetime oppoturnity.....
more update later

tag phobia

2008-07-29T19:30:00.003+08:00

the 20 question tag. (or whatever the actual name is)

Instructions: Remove ONE question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged.

1. Do you believe in love at first sight?
nope
2. Have you ever felt stupid? Why?
always end up be the one that call the stupid guy

3. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
japan

4. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?
go to japan

5. If you can travel through time WITHOUT changing anything. Where would u go & why?
the life before married..how i could change the fact i'm married to someone that doesnt have a heart.

6. If the weather is too hot, where will u go to make urself cooler?
my room

7. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
buy al the things i want and travel throughout the world

8. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
nope

9. Who are the top five people in the world you would wish to meet?
my greatest Creator
my greatest Creator
my greatest Creator
my greatest Creator
my greatest Creator

10. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
i'm tired of asking....

11. Which type of cars I love the most?
cool cars

12. Which do you prefer from your other half? hug? or a kiss?
none

13. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
dont know coz i'm always the one telling the other person

14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
my family

15. Are you a shopaholic or not?
yes and it depend on the situation

16. What peeves you the most?
noisy people and boasting people

17. If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
be more specific in life

18. What makes you feel disappointed?
being such a stupid fool

19. If given a chance, do you want to see your future?
no

20. Would you still be friend your best friend whom had betrayed your trust?
i would rather dont see them ever again

the 8 list tag. (or whatever the actual name is)

1. 8 random facts about me
tired la to boast myself

2. 8 things that scare me
being fooled
being played around
being loser
being sick
being loner
being stupid
being fat
being married to a heartless guy

3. 8 random musics at the moment
i'm yours
say( all i need)
break the ice
bye bye
touch my body
sexy can i
leavin
my love

4. 8 words i say the most
hmm
really
nope
wei
eh
erk
u suck
shit!

5. 8 things/people i treasure the most
myself
my family
my brothers
my friend
my pupils

6. 8 things as your wishlist
baby
buy mini cooper
buy caldina
getting slim and slender
be a good person
buy all the precious things
buy something special for my family

7. 8 'first time' things i ever did
oh shut up! so many things to answer!

another 20 question tag. (or whatever the actual name is)

1) What is the most important thing in your life?
my loved ones

2) What is the last thing that you bought with your own money?
lots of things

3) Where do you wish to get married?
married already

4) How old do you think you will be permanently owned by your love?
hmm

5) Are you in love?
maybe

6) Where was the last restaurant you had dinner?
fig and olive in singapore

7) Name the latest book that you bought?
english grammar

8) What is your full name?
fareeza

9) Do you prefer your mother or father?
both of them

10) Name a person that you really wish to meet in real life for the first time.
my creator

11) Christina or Britney?
hahah wat a weird question

12) Do you do your own laundry?
yup

13) The most exciting place you want to go?
japan

14) Hugs or kisses?
hmm

15) Point out 5 things about the person who tagged you.
curx
a shy man
so shy
and so shy
and so shy
but surely deeply in love wit my beloved kak diah

16)8 things I am passionate about:
my own life....

17)8 things I say too often:
ayarkkss...

18) 8 books I've read recently:
email
flyers
and magazines
hehhehe

19)8 songs I could listen to over and over again:
well, this depends on my mood actually.

20)8 things I learned last year:
being such a shit person in life so that u can survive the IPSMB life that really sucks...
hahhah lazy to answer already...

the 1 list tag. (or whatever the actual name is)

1 minit yang lalu, apa anda buat
answering the tags above.

1 hari yang lalu, apa anda buat
marking like mad

1 hari lagi apa anda akan buat
key in marks for my pupils

1 orang yang terakhir menelefon kamu
my colleague

1 makanan yang baru dibeli
cuttlefish

1 barang yang baru hilang
nothing

1 cerita yang baru ditonton
love guru

1 hal terakhir yang digossipkan
the pupils behaviour

1 kata yang ingin diluahkan
hahahh stunning!

1 buku yang sudah dibaca
refer to "8 books I've read recently" above.

1 penyakit yang sering datang
fever

1 keinginan
relax

hah wat a relieved.....i dont like those stupid tag... i dont want to be tag for another 5 months...
i'm tag phobia!~!~@!@!@

tag carnival will begin.....

2008-07-22T20:01:00.003+08:00

i've been tag for quite some time...i'm picking p my courage to answer all the tag...
yet another tag from "ayang" kak dee...

1. nama-nama timangan oleh org tersayang
- iza
-sayang (called by my hubby only)
-aie

2. anda seorang yang...
- quite blur.
-pretty hectic person when it comes to something that i like.
-loving and caring
-but sometimes pretty scary especially when i'm mad..(ask my hubby)

3. insan teristimewa. describe apa yg membuatkan die terlalu istimewa di mata anda.
- he's quite adorable.
-he doesnt talk so much..
-he's cool.
-he's always there for me.

4. makanan favourite anda
- hmm ask my hubby

5. favourite color
- red
-black
-blue

6. favourite song
- anything that soothes my ears

7. sikap yg membuatkan anda stress
- hmm alot but as time goes by just ignore it..stress will kill you!

8. 3 bende yg mesti ade dalam handbag anda
- alots of things but for sure it is important

9. kali terakhir anda menangis beriya-iya..kenapa??
last saturday when my beloved uncle died!

tribute to my uncle!

2008-07-21T20:12:00.001+08:00

its been three years since his wife passed away..lastly due to his love to his beloved wife;last saturday he passed away...due to acute myocardiac infection..he left his 5 children.i was very devastated coz he was so good to me and close to me like my father.i would like to dedicate this song to all my family
***********************************
BYE BYE
@@@@@@@@@@
tribute to CIk Madi
@>----may you rest in peace..i'll cherish every memories hat i had wit u..love u so much...
************
This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

As a child there were them times
I didn't get it but you kept me in line
I didn't know why you didn't show up sometimes
On Sunday mornings, and I missed you
But I'm glad we talked through
All them grown folk things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There's so much more left to say
If you were with me today face to face

[Chorus:]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
Miss you but I try not to cry
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'd give the world to see your face
And I'm right here next to you
But it's like you're gone too soon
Now the hardest thing to do is say bye bye

(Bye Bye [3x])
Bye bye

And you never got the chance to see how good I've done
And you never got to see me back at number one
I wish that you were here to celebrate together
I wish that we could spend the holidays together

I remember when you used to tuck me in at night
With the Teddy Bear you gave to me that I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
You'd make it through whatever
It's so hard to accept the fact you're gone forever

[Chorus]

(bye bye bye bye bye bye [3x])
Bye bye

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

I'm Yours (*i love this song so much)

2008-07-01T22:36:00.000+08:00

well you done done me and you bet i felt it
i tried to get you but you're so hot that i melted
i fell right through the cracks
and i'm trying to get back
before the cool done run out
i'll be giving it my bestest
nothin's going to stop me but devine intervention
i reckon its again my turn to win some or learn some

i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait, i'm yours

well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love
listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
ah la peaceful melody
its your godforsaken right to be loved love loved love love

so i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait i'm sure
theres no need to complicate
our time is short
this is our fate, i'm yours

i been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
and bendin over backwards just to try to see it clearer
my breath fogged up the glass
so i drew a new face and laughed
i guess what i'm sayin is there ain't no better reason
to rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
its what we aim to do
our name is our virtue

i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait i'm sure
theres no need to complicate
our time is short
it cannot wait, i'm yours

3 months update...wink wink*

2008-06-08T22:14:00.003+08:00

as usual the same punch line when blogging.

.been quite busy with all the school chores..

(hahha see for urself whether this is the same reason i've been using coz its been awhile since my last update)

anyway these three months i've been surfing the net ...

i tried to write an entry but end up with log out.

hehheh such a lazy woman...

but today i am so eager to update my blog...

no wit an interesting entry but a simple one...

************************************************************

my in laws (both twins) had pregnant...

end of this year i'm goin to get two nieces...

lets pray for both of them...

**** i've to be strong for myself*****

************************************************************

kak dee is goin to get married end of the year too...

hope i can be there...

its been a long time since we last gather together...

*******************************************************

to make up for my sadness i've been listening to this song for quite a some time...the wording is so nice....

i want to dedicate this song to kak dee and lynda....

hope both of u like it too.....

missing u a lot....

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Di sana pungguk menanti

Mengharap bulan membalas rindu di hati

Di sini aku berdiri

Menunggu penuh dengan kesabaran
Tanpa manis madah

Janji yang puitis

Tuk persembahan

Hanya ketulusan

Sekeping hati suci
Aku

Berikan kasih

Kalau itu yang kau mahu dari ku

Aku

Berikan cinta

Untuk membahagiakan hari mu

Aku

Sayang dirimu (menyayangimu)

Biarpun nafas ku sampai terhenti

Akan ku kota janji kita

Mendirikan Taj Mahal cinta

Seteguh kasih

Shah Jehan kepada Mumtaznya
Terasa indah pabila berdua

Semakin tiba saat bahagia

Merai cinta kita

1st Anniversary

2008-03-10T17:58:00.002+08:00

today is our first year anniversary....
one year already..
times really flies even faster than our thots..
miss those precious moment...
now still far...
only time can heal our heart together...
thanx for being there for me for one whole year even distance is our accompany...
no words can describe our sacrifices...
but the most important thing is that the loves that we share together...
just keep in mind..
love is complicated but
the truth is love that bind our heart together
even though our soul is departed...
lets pray hard so we can really be together...
so our loves wont be shattered into pieces by the end of time...